Apocalypto

By: Major Issues

Director: Mel Gibson
Stars: Rudy Youngblood, Dalia Hernandez, Jonathan Brewer, Morris Birdyellowhead.
Rating: 4 out of 5

Listen up and listen good. It's time to stand up and salute the finest screen warrior of our time, Mel Gibson. I hope you’re on your feet … back straight … chin up … right arm raised … If not, you obviously haven’t seen Apocalypto. If that’s the case, then why haven’t you? You might learn something about bravery, honour and patriotism, and commitment to family and friends.

What would you do if a vicious tribe invaded your village, brutally killing women, children? I’m waiting. Would you sit on the couch? Watch? Hide? Don’t answer. I already know the vast majority of you pansies wouldn’t even move.

Well, as sure as the sun's gonna shine on my medals tomorrow, we soldiers think differently, and Mel Gibson, well he’s the best. A man couldn’t ask for a more loyal lieutenant, or inspirational leader. Tough, fearless, and uncompromising, but above all else, courageous.

In Apocalypto, Gibson once again leads from the front – as writer/director. Gibson is a born leader. Who else would you expect to guide a cast of complete unknowns through the jungle, with predators waiting to cut them down? Cut their heads off. Rip their hearts from their chests. No one.

Fortunately for Jaguar Paw (Rudy Youngblood), Gibson is watching over him. After his village is rampaged by a fierce tribe, Jaguar Paw hides his family in a cave and is taken to be sacrificed. This is not a movie for those of you who reach for a bucket at the sight of blood.

Apart from providing the perfect backdrop for a milatry ambush - most likely using claymore cluster and trip wires with full air support - the forest landscape is the perfect backdrop to this picture which tells of the brutal end of an the Mayan Civilisation.

Now, I do not want to hear as much as a whimper from you slackers about the subtitles on the this movie either. This is a film for men. Real men

Verbatim:
 Blunted: If this works, she won't bother me.  
Flint Sky: Your wife?  
Blunted: No, her mother, the old hag wants grandchildren